'Horse Sh*t' becomes legal motion in U.S Judicial System

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Administrative, criminal, and civic proceedings can often be a bore. Not only to jury members and witnesses, but to attorneys and judges alike. This staleness can often cost people undeserved life sentences, hefty fines, or clean slates in order to simply end the day's drudgery.

In a bizarre attempt to rejuvenate and liven up the United States judicial system, there has been an addition to the rules regarding motions. The ever-popular 'horse sh*t' is a term not unfamiliar to court cases in television shows and movies, but is hardly ever accepted in real court cases. Well now the fan favorite verbal retort is making a jump from celluloid to the stand.

"Horse sh*t just rolls off the tongue so much easier, and is much more fun to say," says Chief Justice of the Supreme Court John Roberts.

Roberts also believes this new type of motion will create a better overall judicial system.

"Court cases can become so dangerously boring that no one is even paying attention anymore. The formalities are piled too high for people to get over within a reasonable amount of time. Horse sh*t allows us to bypass some of those formalities and to get things done."

Others believe the new form of motion is too broad and vague to have a practical place in the court system. Such believers have admitted their overwhelming jealousy for new law students who get to use 'horse sh*t' in their trial courses.

Whether or not real viles of horse sh*t are allowed in the court is to be determined, but it looks like there's a good horse shot that will happen.