There has been a sharp outcry from the reindeer community regarding the testing."Rudolf is just the front man, the cover boy. If you need to get sh*t done in the reindeer community, you go to Blitzen" says Donner.
Blitzen's results may have an impact far greater than the embarrassment of the North Pole.
"With Blitzen testing positive for doping, there is a good chance the entire Christmas of 2012 will have to be stripped. All the presents burned or otherwise destroyed. Everything goes." says the Meister Burger.
Santa neglected to comment on the allegations.
Hermey the Elf was able to shed some light on the situation.
"Well if you know anything about the Reindeer, you know that it's dog-eat-dog. They literally eat the ones that can't fly. And Blitzen tested for blood doping. It's very likely that he just ate a brother or sister of his that has his same blood type, which has caused an increase in his red blood cells. The dude's a brute. But he gets things done."
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