Whether we're part of a dream, or just shadows and dust, Friday your soul will be on real or fake fire and demons will be punching your grandmother.
With the end of days rapidly approaching, many people have taken different approaches to face their impending doom.
One school of philsophy, nihilists, who believe there is not any greater meaning or intrinsic value to life, have found themselves at a crossroads of emotions, or lackthereof.
To express too much emotion about anything is not usually their bag, but to see everyone in a tiff to because they are to be vaporized by their insignificance, is just fantastic.
"We really don't like to give two sh*ts about anything. But to have people freaking out about the apocalypse is just hilarious," says one person who didn't care to have a name, for names are just titles, which represent us, us who are nothing or no-thing.
"It's kind of like the Super Bowl for us. We want it to be a big party of anti-emotion. But that would be pretty much what we're already doing. If we get stoked for it, we're not being nihilists. But what's the point of being a nihilist if you can't get pumped for non-existence. Frankly, it's confusing."
For religious fanatics, the rapture is of course a very exciting time. But they're always getting worked up about Hey-Zeus coming back in town with a totally gnarley biker gang, usurping Jay-Z, and running this town tonight. I think that's how Dat New New Testament goes.
For us regular folk, this Friday will just be a good excuse to get drunk and hope that Bruce Willis saves the world. But if you see a nihilist (they will probably be listening to Tan Vampires or static on a television) inject him or her with some epinephrine (AKA testosterone - it gets ya jacked up!) and make him shotgun a Steel Reserve. Then watch Road Warrior and The Big Lebowski. If these things are now your Friday night plans, you're welcome.
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